Thursday, April 30, 2009

The Art...

Of prolonging a game of hangman:
This is a comprehensive guide to hangman continuation. Why? Because though nearly everyone has played this simple game before, only a selective few know how to really play it. The masses are under the impression that it is possible to lose hangman. You, my readers, are the privileged few who are going to be enlightened. We'll go through and learn how to play the proper why as well as advancing our artistic abilities.
Starting off, we have a gallows:

I am thinking it looks a little too forbidding. Better change that:
Much better. Now comes the time to think of a word. Nothing too hard at first, of course. Try word that people don't generally know, but aren't so long that the daunted players roll their eyes and leave. You do have to know how to spell the word. Otherwise, people tend to get irritated when they discover they've been wondering what

A ___ O T

could possibly mean, and then once they give up you tell them you were spelling "alot." (No, I have not actually done that.) In my example, I shall use the word, "kaleidoscopic."

After that crucial step is completed, you gather some players (most likely several unwilling immediate family members or some dear friends, or some people who owe you money.) They do some guessing in the traditional manner, and guess e, i, and a. However, then Billybob guesses, "t." You have two options, depending on how long your word is. One, draw a circle head:





Two, draw the top of the skull: You want him to have a strong jaw, right? Then take the next three mistakes to draw the right jaw, left jaw, and the chin.

Use the next mistakes to add details in the order that follows:


Neck

Shoulders

Spine (If your word is very long, try doing this by segment.)

Hips

legs

feet

arms

elbows

hands.



And then the face.

Eyes, (one at a time) eyebrows, (also one at a time) mouth, nose, ears (one at a time.)

Now come the part where you put you imagination to work. There are thousands of details you can add: suit jacket, cumberband, gloves, shoes, a fancy belt, hair (by the strand if you need to) hat, a flower for the button hole, a cape, opera glasses in the hand, (can you tell my hangman is a high-class criminal?) socks, a pocketknife, an earring, etc.


Practice this, first beginning with shorter words and making the drawing last through that. Then work your way to longer words and still keeping the dude alive.
Follow a length guideline something like this:

pi
sly
wallop
panegyrize
Lovingkindness
Sesquipedalianism
Sociopsychocultural
Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis

Mayhaps you are asking yourself why you would chose to prolong a game of hangman.
First, there are obviously the ethical reasons. Hanging has a definate negative conotation and could possibly reflect that spirit of negativity back on the players, but if insist on playing the game in the first place, then you might as well make it uplifting.

NOTE: To help along the positive message of the game, one can always invent the epilogue, where the nearly hung person goes back to jail, talks to a shrink about his dysfunctional childhood, reforms, and opens the bakery he's always dreamed of once he has paid his debt to society.

"How can I put my newly acquired skills to work?"you ponder. Are you asking yourself what use this ability possibly has? Ask no more:

I will delicately put that this skill is extremely useful for putting certain undesirable events off, namely bedtimes. =D ("Mom, may we play just one more game of hangman before we go to bed" "Sure!" "Yesssss.")

2 COMMENTS:

Jare said...

Ah I'm bad enough at hangman!

That video was uper funny, I want to see the movie now =)

Calico Zak said...

Nice Vid very funny.
and as for long words the longest one I knew until Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis was Antidisestablishmentarianism

~Calico Zak