Saturday, February 28, 2009
Friday, February 27, 2009
Sommmmme day, my hedgehog will commmme...
Then again maybe not. Let's focus on the lessons we can learn from fish. Like not judging appearances. Perhaps this fellow in the above picture really possesses a heart of gold underneath his rough exterior. Somehow I am recieving the distinct impression that 'rough' is an understatement.First of all, vertical stripes are slimming. (Fashion isn't my forte)
#2. You're never fully dressed without a smile.
#3. Always keep an eye out for others, unless you don't have any: Eyes, that is, not others.
#4. Don't get prickly or be easily offended.
#5. Don't worry about feeling like a wall flower; everybody has days like that.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Bmy gendtle readers, I bmust thang you bery buch for bearing with bme. I amb fully aware thadt I haven'dt bposted anythig ladely. The facgt is, I amb nodt exagly feeling adt the topb ob bmy gameb. Sombday soon I shall breakg indo a streekg ob insbiration and bpost evbery day.
P.S. In Blogger's terms of agreement, there is no "in sickness or in health clause," so I am allowing myself to take some days off of blogging without feeling quilty. Not that I have been posting faithfully anyway. Ah well.
On second thought, forget "Ah Well." I use that phrase far to much, and it conveys a rather Bertie Woosterish feel: a character which I appreciate, but shall not choose to imitate.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Alrighty, I seriously need some advice here: what is every one's favorite, hysterical book/short story?
P.S. I know this isn't a real blog post. I merely avoiding the fact that I haven't posted hardly at all in the commendable month of February.
Wait, is February a commendable month? Actually, I don't think that fine adjective applies to the situation at all. February is the tricky month because every year, about the third week, we get 3-4 days of mild temperatures, and glorious sunshine, and then BAM! Rain falls from the sky like bullets and clouds "hang ominously" in the sky.
(Note: I am sure that "hang ominously" is a famous phrase from something, even if I am not exactly sure what.)
I don't mind it; I love the rain, and once I wrote a poem about how after the "dry, wicked summer," rain fell again in the Autumn and the whole world was alive again. Poor Mom had the task of breaking to me that my views on the seasons were almost directly contrary to the rest of the world's, who thought that in Autumn everything went to sleep.
Come to think of it, maybe there is a reason why I am not a famous poet. I also think that fear is like a quick rush of heat rather than a cold feeling.
P.P.S. Anyway, please be sure to answer the question!
Sunday, February 22, 2009
The posting are up! Wait, I mean the poll results are up. (I'm still in speech tournament mode.)
Stupid? 1 vote
Maddening? 2 votes
Jolly? 10 votes
Thrilling? 7 votes
Whatsa poll? 3 votes
From these statistics, we can derive that I had there actually are some poll loving masses because the majority of gentle readers say that poll are jolly or thrilling.
If you voted 'stupid' or 'maddening' I am going to assume that you were joking for I stand resolved that if you really felt that way, you wouldn't of voted at all. (If that makes any sense.)
Now I am going to dream up an idea for my next poll.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
As well as selling wonderful objects for small amounts of money, shopping at Goodwill can be an excellent source of entertainment. Because our church’s men’s meeting takes place in the DeBusschere living room, the members of the family who do not wish to attend yet, or cannot because they are not men, must find a place to pass the time while the meeting is going on. During this long stretch of time from 7 to 9, Mom decided that we would take a visit to our home-away-from-home, Goodwill, and that we were going to have a little fun. Sauntering into the thrift store, each of us had a mission to find an item for every member of the family that they would pose with in a picture. I chose a homely wooden doll for Ava, ethereal windchimes for Mom, a ruffely, heart shaped Christmas apron for Ophelia and a pillow that had a dog embroidered on it for milo. The pillow stunk. Giles’ object was my crowning achievement, a very realistic looking afro-ish wig that consisted of adorable brunette corkscrew curls! Posing for our picture in the ludicrous outfits we’d picked out for each other, we made quite a sight for puzzled passers-by.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Some people; they play hard to get.
I'm playing hard to want,
And ain't nobody got me yet,
That is my challenge taunt.
I'll grow myself a uni-brow,
And pack some extra pounds.
I'll never cut my toenails now.
I'll always make disgusting sounds.
Perhaps I'll never brush my teeth,
Or use deodorant.
My hair will poof; a fuzzy wreath.
Yes, I'm playing hard to want.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Ophelia decided that this post did not accurately reflect her heart, so now it's gone forever.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
This is my dear cousin Audrey. She is as awesome as they come.
To quote the venerable Boynton, "Turn with the cow in a patch in a patch of clover, All take a bow and [this post] is over.
Friday, February 6, 2009
This is undoubtedly more of a vague exclamation than most sayings. "Gag me with a spoon," is not an idiom that reveals some truth about life or imparts any pearls of wisdom. Rather, it conveys a distinct disgust at something disturbing or in most cases, hypo-criticism.
It requires a certain elasticity of facial features to really say "Gag me with a spoon" correctly. Namely, the lip must curl ever so slightly, and one eyebrow must be raised in a hint of superiority.
And "spoon" must not be spoken with only one syllable, it must be given two to achieve the proper element of scorn. "Spoo-oon!" Or in some cases of extreme horror, the expression may be ended with "Gag me with a pitchfork." Please don't ask me why. However, you must be careful: like as not, the only person who can rightly use the expression this way is my dad. If you use the pitchfork ending, people will just look at you like you are weird.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Here's the view looking down:
Here's another picture of the sun:
Check out that sunlight!
Wait, I think that's my thumb. I'll never be a photographer.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Bracie and my job of Alpaca Pasture Maintenance has its ups and downs. As she and I performed our task today, we were painfully reminded of one of the job's disadvantages; that of the leaf blowin' man. Next door and across the street from the pastures lives a man with a passion for ordered lawns and a strong affection for his leaf blower. For now we will call him Leif B. Gonn.
Anyway, it seems as if every time Bracie and I drive in to do our job, he maliciously gets out that noisy contraption, meticulously blowing his leaves into everybody else's yard. If not that, then the mower or rake or what-have-you.
(Note: the following paragraph is fiction.)
Leif's beloved leaf blower kicked the bucket, and being unable to sustain the thought of life without it, Mr.Gonn keeled over and died with the machine. Because I have a heart for the community, to help him out I have written him an original epitaph.
Here lies a leaf-blowin man
In life the motor started,
Our ears his blower bombarded,
Now dearly departed,
Champion of mowers,
Greenest grass grower,
best of all leaf Blowers,
Mr. Leif B. Gonn
Monday, February 2, 2009
HI everybody! I'm not dead! I just thought that for a week I'd simply pretend computers didn't exist and stop and smell the roses. You really ought to. Don't read my blog; get out there and enjoy the fabulous February, uh, er... sunshine?
Or more accurately, go play in the rain, or snow drifts or whatever you have.
Anyway, soon I'll type you a nice long, long post.