Horse vs. Chicken

Habitat. The word conotates a natural home, a perfect environment, the right place, a sense of belonging. Today, when I went out to feed the pets, I was unnerved to discover clucking coming from the horses' stalls. We own four chickens, and I found two inside.

Hm. 4-2=2. I trotted over to the chicken coop/run to see if the others were already inside.

I discovered a little more than I bargained for. Trapped in the tiny coop was my beautiful horse! He was caught, held inside by my two evil chickens, who would flap their wings every time he attempted to get out.

Eventually, I got the poor dear out, but the event made me laugh: I found the chickens in the horse stall, and the horse in the chicken coop.

I never would have guessed that in the scenario: horse vs. chicken, chicken would come out on top!

Bit and Bridle

I flopped on my bed, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn my literature assignment, in hand. After reading into several lines, I became aware of a cold sensation around my ankle. Frigid metal dug into my foot until I was distracted enough to investigate. I reached down and pulled up a bit! An loose ring, jointed, snaffle. In my bed. Weird. The extreme coldness of it has officially reminded me to always warm the bit before I put it in my horse's mouth.

It is cold, but it doesn't smell at all like Autumn, so I feel cheated.

Have any of you ever started a first person-narrated novel without knowing what the main character's name is? That's sort of the dilemma I am in right now. Or write now.

Back to Huckleberry Finn...
"But it warn't no time to be sentimentering."

Or here's why I titled that post, Fog:
"For nothing don't look natural or sound natural in a fog." I think my brain is still foggy. I'd better go study my Euclid or some Dialogues of Plato to clear it.

The Highlands, Sylwyness, and Photos Galore

How do you really spell Sylwyness? Is it really a word? In the (2) lessons of latin I studied, we had to repeat, "Sylwa, Sylwae, Forest, Forest" over and over and over again.

Anyway, here are Bracie and I holding our new, insanely awesome, Scottish DIRKS!!!
Bracie is looking very lovely and Elvish.

And what could be more awesome than running with your cloak flying in the wind? By the way, green cloaks are excellent for camouflage, but it makes them difficult to photograph. =D

Dewey leaves seem to occur frequently in photography, and I felt the need to try my hand at it. Sargeant, my dog, nearly destroyed the leaf by licking it, stepping on it or eating it, about seventeen times.

This one is Bracie's:

Mine:

Aren't they awesome! I am spilling over with delight! They were gifts from my grandmother, who went to Scotland recently. They came unsharpened, but took them to a professional sharpener. We get them back next Thursday.

As you can see from the vast amounts of pictures I am posting, I am quite obsessed with my dirk.

I need some knee socks to slip it into for Easy Transportation. =D (That's one of the traditional ways of wearing them)

Grandma also gave Bracie and I each a beret. I really, really wish I had Scottish heritage.

Once, when I was talking to Bracie and my little brother Giles was listening, I said,

"Oh, I really want a Scottish Dirk!"

Giles piped up, "Why not have a nice Scotsman? I think you'd have a happier life."

"What???" I was confused.

"You said you wanted a Scottish Jerk!!!" he cried.

"No, Giles, a Scottish Dirk!" We had a good laugh over that one.

My poor pony...

How humiliating for the poor dude. In the first picture, you can see him wincing.

Hullo.

Yessssss-sir-ee-bob-I-am-back!

That lovely picture is me smooching my former turtle. P.T. was released back into the wild sometime in spring. He is probably having a lot of fun without me. What a depressing thought.

I shall attempt to post slightly more regularly, but let's face it: it's summer and I have stuff to do, like, well, live! Not, of course, that I am not grateful for all the miracles of modern invention. I am simply relishing swimming, and riding, and writing (with a pencil) and running, and drawing, and all those other primitive activities.

Beware of the Cat

The feline in the above pictures is quite a presence at our house, making herself especially noticable to neighbor and visiting dogs. Twice, she has pounced upon and ridden on top of our neighbors' pooch. That is to say, she is particularly intolerant of, ahem, canine trespassers.

In another instance, she picked a visiting dog up in her teeth and treated the poor thing shamefully.

So, beware of the cat!

Equine Paragons

Mine Equines:

(That's one awful representation of my darling!)

They are really the most lovely horses in the world, though the camera cannot capture them perfectly. All my fellow horsey people do know that horses are un-photogenic. Where's Mark J. Barret when you need him? (And by the way, he completely trumps Bob Langrish)

The orange pony is Maximus, (with the name "Gluteous" in front if I am particularly angered with him.) He is a darling. Annually, we roach his mane and forelock and he sports a spiky hairdo. And he is the world's best, most darling pony.

The blood bay is Chess, and he is a dreamboat. No more need be said.

P.S. I know all you other horsey persons are sitting there, rolling your eyes, and thinking that your babies are prettier, but they aren't. Don't take it too hard. =D

The Zoo is enlargening!

Lottie, our dear cat, (See above picture [we don't have very recent pictures!]) had four kittens on the 12th.

This is Chauncy, or at least that is his name for now. One looks like her mom. Until they develop more distinct personalities, I am calling the other two Boba and Jango because they resemble each other exactly.

And as well as these feline additions, we have acquired Mango and Tango, two orange fish whose particular variety I cannot precisely remember at this moment in time.

Dream on, Ophy

I feel like Veruca Salt because I have spent the last 10 minutes wandering around muttering under my breath, I want, I want, I want...

But what is this object that Ophelia so fervantly desires?

I won't keep you in suspense any longer- Wait, that's presuming that you were in a state of suspension. Uh, I will now reveal the- Hold it! How can something be RE-vealed if I am not even sure it's been vealed? Actually, I am positived it can't be reVEALED because we are all familiar with the fact that veal is a particularily gamey meat taken from a deer.

And what I want is not veal. It isn't even a deer, and though I want that too, it isn't the thing I had in mind.

Wait, what I want isn't a thing, they're a-

Sommmmme day, my hedgehog will commmme...

Fish

Here we see a fish:
Let us pause for a moment marvel at the beauty of these amazing creatures.

Then again maybe not. Let's focus on the lessons we can learn from fish. Like not judging appearances. Perhaps this fellow in the above picture really possesses a heart of gold underneath his rough exterior. Somehow I am recieving the distinct impression that 'rough' is an understatement.First of all, vertical stripes are slimming. (Fashion isn't my forte)

#2. You're never fully dressed without a smile.

#3. Always keep an eye out for others, unless you don't have any: Eyes, that is, not others.
#4. Don't get prickly or be easily offended.
#5. Don't worry about feeling like a wall flower; everybody has days like that.

An Introduction to my dogs...

I was considering the possibility of an opening sentence like, "Dogs, you just gotta love them," or "Here we see man's best friend," or something else cheesy and cliche like that. However, luckily for you, I have decided against it. Instead, I will start with...

Uhhhhhh, what am I going to start with? Anyway, the dog above is Sergeant displaying his most striking military pose. Here's Kipper. He won't sit still for the camera. As you can see, he's extremely unphotogenic.

These two mutts are especially beloved, but not especially well-trained.To be precise, they can perform two "tricks" between the two of them; Sergeant can sit, and Kipper can come.

Although this is technically an introduction, I am afraid that for rather obvious reasons, (Example: Me: "So Sargent, what do you think of blogging? Serge: "Bark" ...that wouldn't quite make the cut.) I was unable to conduct the interview in accordance with tradition.

Well, there you have it folks: my dogs, if you were interested in knowing. I am not entire certain why I am posting about them, but I know that one of these days a really, really funny story will turn up about them.

The Pet Meme
What is the first pet you remember? The very first pet... A goldfish. I know I know, that's incredibly boring, but hey, I was probably 3 or 4. I remember most distinctly when he died. Dad asked if I wanted to flush it down the toilet to bury it, or if I wanted to bury in the back yard. I, of course, chose to bury it in the back yard. Where is the honor in flushing it down the toilet?


How many different kinds of pets have you owned? Okay, I'll start with fish; a goldfish named Goldfish, two betas named Ruby and Sapphire, and two catfish, one called Old Man Low, the other Pedro. Giles had a big, black and orange fish who's name I cannot remember. We also have one turtle, named P.T. for Pastor Tom. We have had various frogs and snakes for several days, only to be released soon after. And we used to have 10 chickens, but now we have 6. Their names are (if I can remember all of them...) Nefertiti,(sp?), Boaz, Ruth, Ribbon, Shifrah, Puah, Hadassah, Hapshetsut,(sp? who knows how to spell these Egyption names? Aaaah!) and two that didn't have names. We also had two guinea pigs, mine called Brownie, Bracie's called Poppyseed.We have had 11 cats, including kittens that we gave away, and our two current felines, Lottie and Rosemary. Our "big" pets are our large, odiforous dogs, Sargeant and Kipper, and our two horses, Maximus and Chess.


What was your strangest pet? None of our pets are that strange. Am I missing out on something? Wait, I just remembered; we had sea monkeys. Now, on the box of the sea monkeys container, they have this little cartoon, with a nice little family:

When they finally hatch, or whatever it is that sea monkeys do, they look like this:
You "train" them, as the box so proudly proclaims, by shining a flashlight in the tank, and they swim after it. Huh.

What is your dream pet? A Black Akhal Teke. All the way. Akhal Tekes are the loveliest horses immaginable.

What is your nightmare pet? Turkeys. I positively cannot stand them. Don't try to tell me they are misunderstood; they are EVIL!

Tell your best/funniest pet story. I have to think about that one...

Tell your worst/saddest pet story. A pet's death hits me really hard. It is always tragic when one dies.

Did you ever have a scary animal experience? Well, once I got flung off my horse when he was spooked by a deer. Then I caught him, and another deer came, and he pushed me into the nettles. :-P
What was your favorite pet? What multiple pet owner can possibly pick favorites?
What did you really want to tell us about your pets that didn’t fit in the other questions?I just make the questions fit if I want them to! :-D
The tags: I tag
1. Ashley
2. Ana
3. I don't know many other people with blogs! If you visit this site, and your name isn't here, consider yourself tagged. (Evil Laugh!)

The rules. Don’t worry. They’re easy.
Copy the questions to your blog. Answer them. This is the fun part.
Tag as many people as the legs on your leggiest pet.

My Grand Adventure...

So, I was innocently sitting in my ugly orange chair today, and as I was blogging...

Wait, That's too nerdy.

...and while I was eating an apple...

Wait, that makes me sound like a pig.
...and while I was reading an engrossing Soup book...

Wait, that makes me look like an idiot.
No, I was reading Don Quixote like I was supposed to, when

Predictably, my attention wandered, and I caught sight of my dear turtle P.T.(short for Pastor Tom) in his newly revamped tank. I got out the camera, and I was taking some pictures,


When I realized that there was something in the tank! I stared at the form in the water, and then I inhaled sharply. Was it my imagination, or could it be...
... a bottle? I stood, intranced, and then I took a closer look.
It was a bottle, and not merely that, it was a bottle with a message in it! This was beginning to smell like an adventure. I began to dream of a map that would lead to abundant treasure, or perhaps an tragic plea for help. I grabbed the bottle, despite the horrible risk of catching salmonella. (No offense, P.T.)
I reached in the tank, grasped the bottle, and pulled it up into the light.
After much difficulty with the cork, I managed to get it unplugged.
Inside was a paper, perhaps vellum. What could it say? There was no other way to find out than to take it out and read it.
After vigorous shaking and much difficulty, I finally managed to get the old, yellowed paper out.

I held the treasure map, or whatever it was in my hand. My face lit up with triumph and anticipation. Perhaps I would be the next Ben Gates on National Treasure or something. I carefully unrolled the paper, as though it was sacred,
... only to discover it was an advertisement for... EGGS! *To discover how I felt about having my adventure dashed to pieces, see the next two pictures.*

And, thus, the paper was removed from the bottle, and placed where it belongs. THE END