Tuesday, November 4, 2008

The First episode in the Chronicles of Miss Penelope Faullty

Inspector Winderby: (wearily) “Suspect number fourteen, please come forward. Name, please?”
Penelope: (brightly)“Miss Penelope Alexandria Juliana Faullty. With two l’s if you please.”
Inspector Winderby: (automatically) “Miss Faullty, can you supply any information regarding this recent unpleasant business?”
Penelope: (uncertainly) “Must I tell the truth?”
Inspector Winderby: (incredulously) “That, Miss, is why you were sworn in!”
Penelope: (doubtfully) “I raised my left hand instead of my right. Doesn’t that make a difference?”
Inspector Winderby: (sternly) “Not in the least!”
Penelope: (reluctantly) “Well, (sniff) it was… (sniff) me.”
Inspector Winderby: (loudly) “You! What did you say your name was?”
Penelope: (slowly) “Miss Penelope Alexandria Juliana Faullty. With two L’s.”
Inspector Winderby proceeds to attempt to put handcuffs on Penelope.
Penelope: (tearfully) “Handcuffs! The idea of putting handcuffs on a lady. You will make me cry!” Penelope begins to sniffle profusely.
Inspector Winderby: (unsympathetically) “Fancy calling a confessed murderer a lady. A lady spends her time doing much more charitable things than committing murder.”
Penelope: (indignantly) “You are taking an unstable position on the conduct of ladies. In not so many words: you are quite wrong. They kill people all the time; it is merely that they are excellent at putting the blame on somebody else.”
Inspector Winderby: (severely) “Er… never mind all that. Why did you kill Miss Charity Ellison?”

4 COMMENTS:

Gabby said...

Wow I cant wait for the next one ;)

Anonymous said...

Sounds slightly Arsenic-and-old-Lace-ish to me. I like it.
k

Anonymous said...

Oh, oh, oh, I just thought of something! We should do this in increments with everyone and get it on Auddie. Yeah, that's what I voted. But maybe you should name it Neston, like the word verification code.
k

Anonymous said...

Neston is a super awesome name for a Flip. What do you think, Ophe?

K, are you going to send out that email full of geeky computar genious sayings to me so I can look super smart/nerdy, or what?
Did you get "Neston" from this list? Or am I just so non computar savvy that I don't get it?

bracie